Jedi Chat
by Jedi Master Plo Koon
Summary: Name says all well sorta


Jedi Chat

Kk: Hello I'm Kevin Kingsten and I'm your host on Jedi chat well sense we have a very loss and calm schedule I think we should start the show. I would like you to put your hands together for a young brave soul from a different galaxy little miss Lily Kilo come on down.

Lk: Thanks Kevin well its wonderful to be here tonight.

Kk: yes well how have the jedi been?

Lk: oh there doing good I think it waseasy to find the right people you trust to run a academy or as I should say nine!

Kk: nine academy's wow how do you manage?

Lk: well it isn't easy it takes time and patients which I'm slowly running out of same with damned data chips for my data pads yikes it could give a normal being a quick death.

Kk: well yes I can see that it is very stressful to run one academy but nine I'm amazed your hair isn't gray.

Lk: yes well it's odd I never seem to change maybe I do grow or I don't maybe I do age or I don't to be honest I don't even know where the trip I had gone on had started and where it had ended I have about ninety-five thousand student training under me alone to all the millions those damned building's hold.

Kk: yikes you have ninety-five thousand kids that your training alone I think I would have aged and died a very early age if I had that many students.

Lk: yes I know yet I ignore how many students I have oh if you're wondering why the wall is a bit expanded it just my apprentices. –Eyes go huge with slow inpatient and running out of data pad chips-

Kk: yikes how do you fit them all into your ship?

Lk: what ship if I can fit them all in my ship with myself I would rather be on a planet with no air then suffocate from my own students and if we entered space the windshield would shatter.

Kk: so how did you get all of them here?

Lk: by the one thousand five hundred and ninety three ships that are in the hanger and on the entire landing platform and out in the plains or any clear areas there are.

-Kevin gasps for air he sees what she means when some one is suffocated by a lot of weight-

-Lily grabs the poisons slither choke snake and slices it in half-

-The audience claps when she cuts it in two and poisoned blood gushes out they see her walk and lift the desk.

Kk: where did she go? –Looks up- Holy space cows how the hell did you do that and thanks for saving my life.

Lk: easy her lightsabers glow on her belt.

Kk: b… but how I m… mean it couldn't have been easy.

Lk: No it wasn't but I'm stronger then most humanoids.

Kk: yes I see that.

Kk: well It all for you all today please tune in next time when we shouldn't have any one who set a damned snake on the person being interviewed or the damned host!

Kk: this is Kevin Signing off.

Jedi Chat

Kk: well hello to another show of Jedi chat I'm your host Kevin Kingsten I'm very glad for what happened last week I truly hope she knows how grateful I am. But now a man from a distant galaxy a man who no one knows of please welcome Digon Kilo.

Dk: Thanks Kevin and hey don't worry I'm not mad at your friends I know who would have done such a dastardly thing.

Kk: well I'm glad she saved me from that evil little monster..

Dk: yeah I know I think anyone who's anyone would have so loved to do what Harry Kilersly has done.

Kk: how do you know who did it?

Dk: 'cause I know my enemy's and I know his friends.

-A voice from the audience screams: you lying jerk I never touched him I would say you did it!-

Dk: oh shut up Kilersly I know your family tree I know you are all low down ass's who never keep their fat ugly puss filled noses out of other peoples Business!

Kilersly: NO I WON'T SHUT UP YOU BETTER LISTEN AND LISTEN GOOD OR I'LL RUN YOU THROUGH!

Dk: with what? Hmmm. one of you mommies little earrings ha I can destroy a tiny little pipsqueak like you bowl full of bantha crap!

-Kilersly turn's red he is on top of digon in seconds his saber inches away from digon's heart digon wiggles but the saber misses hit heart only by meters the pain could have killed any one he screamed in a agonizing tone Kilersly leaps back to his seat-

Kilersly: there I've made my point you will wear that scare with full shame for ignoring the truth or die before help comes.

-there was a blur of something speeding by a green and blue blur zoom straight for Kilersly he dodges it easily and starts laughing with a dark tone to his laughter then his hand is cleanly sliced off and his leg is cut he falls in agony then vanishes and lays next to Digon-

-then digon vanishes and rose stands next to Kevin-

Kk: Rose I'm amazed you can zoom so fast but did you really have to…

Rk: yes sir I had to really cut his hand off he's a sith lord and a strong one at that but not as strong as I'm.

Kk: great well I'm sorry for the horrors you have seen. But I beg you to please oh please OH PLEASE tune in next week I beg you while I'm on my knees I beg you on my belly I BEG YOU PLEASE OH PLEASE TUNE IN –goes hysterical and is dragged off the stage by rose- Rk: Kevin signing off.

Jedi Chat

Rk: I'll be hosting today's show Kevin is still a bit hysterical my good friend and love please welcome Peter Sua

Ps: thank you Rosie I think you look pretty today.

-Giggles-Rk: how have you been Peter?

Ps: good it's been hard to do this for the empire but if they were watching this right now here is my message. –Flashes on bottom of screen: You are all are jerks I believe you will destroy everything we have worked for you fat banthas who would call yourselves worthy! -

Rk: hey you can't say that!

Ps: well I already have do you have a problem?

Rk: well to be honest no I would have loved to say that to the imperials faces myself but I just never would have said it a million billion people out there in five out of a gazillion galaxies your braver then I'm.

Ps: yes thank you lovely.

Rk: ok we will see you next week if Kevin doesn't snap out of it soon I'll be hosting again or some one else and tune in on every day night and hour if you can catch this show for now Rose signing off.

Jedi Chat

-Back stage- Rk: What you can't be serious are you telling me Kevin is out there foaming at the mouth insane!

Mh: no I just lost him I believe john has him but he wont answer his damned comlink

Jh: Hey let me out of this damned closet he's crazed I tell you he ordered me inside and I've been in here for a long while.

-Walks to closet and stabs activated saber through door and backs up for a reply a yellow saber is stabbed from inside she slowly unlocks the door then opens it and john falls out-

she looks annoyed then turns toward the stage and sees an empty chair she walks in circles then grabs Kevin who's on the ground and orders him to snap himself together or he will be interviewing sith for a while. he didn't snap out of it so she sent him to the other show which should start a bit after this show ends.

-Yet Kevin just stays in a small ball she smacks him but he just curls up-

Lk: I'll do it.

Rk: oh thank spoons.

Lk: umm I've never heard you say such a silly thing before but oh well.

-Lily walks out on stage and sits at the desk-

Lk: hello I'm lily kilo Kevin hasn't snapped out of it yet I think they are transferring him any way lets see here err oh damned what the hell is today!

Lady from audience: I believe today is um Friday.

Lk: thank you. Now lets see oh yes my friend HENRY!

Hp: hello lily how have you been?

Lk: oh wonderful now that your here.

Hp: hmmm hey lets go after this show and see if we can help Kevin I hear he's going to be doing the sith chat later today.

Lk: ok.

-Three hours run by of them chattering then the buzzer buzzes and they both say-

Lk and Hp: well we'll see you next time tune in when you can Lily and henry signing off.

-Walk to sith chat inc and sees Kevin running around then rose and sith on ground then rose easily stepping out of the way gasped when see lady hit then she runs out onto stage and yells at Kevin and kicks him smacks him and almost kills him by beating him then she looks at henry as he drags her away-


End file.
